You can now become the proud parent of a big bouncy bovine! Simply choose your favorite cow(s), then make out and send in the form below. We will perform an intense and detailed background study to see if you are worthy to become the adopted parent of one of these babies. Then we will send you an information packet by email to comfirm that you are, indeed, one of the lucky adopters. Thus will begin the final and most important test- whether you are actually willing to pay good money to receive a complete history, adoption papers, and a photograph of a fictional cow-type character.

Snowflake suffers from the "Boy Named Sue" syndrome. Don't mess with him. And whatever you do, don't ask how he got his name.	Snowflake
Pickles	Pickles got her name from some very peculiar eating habits. She won't touch grass, but let her go in a field of cucumbers and she'll swell up like the Hindenburg. This is either a strength or a weakness, depending on what you're looking for, because she's also a great source of methane.
Rupert Pox was found abandoned along the road by our team of cow catchers. His family was forced to give up farming and move to an apartment in the city. The apartment manager didn't allow cows.	Rupert Pox
Arlotta Moofellow	Arlotta Moofellow never discovered she was made of wood, so she just hangs around waiting for someone to care about her. But her milk is sappy and her meat tough. She desperately needs affirmation.
Jason "Iggy" Seratonin suffers from gender confusion, as you can see from her photograph. After siring 150 girls, Jason's papa was desperate for a boy. Unfortunately, Jason was the next one out of the chute.	Jason "Iggy" Seratonin